No fortune, only pennies exploded on the floor. It all came to a head. And her mother wouldn’t die. She shattered the water bottle filled with pennies. They were everywhere in the room. She wasn’t going to pick them up. They can clean it when I'm gone. It’s a mess. This house has never been a mess and now she was going to fill it. Everything had to be clean and contained no matter the cost. Nothing out of place. What will I do when you are gone? The fight is not over because you are gone. I will forever be haunted by your disapproval, your rigid anger. Your scathing hate. And there she was in that house. That very clean house, where disregard had been defiance. Lightning. Hate. Love. Obligation. Fear. The tedium, the rage. Surrender. But to what. The man on the mower in the middle of the street. Oblivious. The man, entitled to his mower and his movement. Another Florida asshole in my way. I honked, loudly. He took umbrage. Of course he did. He didn't realize what he released....
Lord have mercy Lord have mercy Why is it so hard? For me to believe To say I believe Hi everybody, I believe But I’m lost I’m a liar I’m a fraud In the crease between Who I am, and Who, speaks to me Who, shouts at me I am darkness I am searing pain I am terrified of who I am And what I might do The visions The evil The charging Overpowering Vision of my actions If unchecked Terrify me That, an instant Might yield such horror Might kill, that which I love Might grab something And cause pain I can’t do it I won’t do it I don’t trust, that the vision Might be real Might reveal Every bit of darkness Within me It was a flash of what could be It was like a lightning strike of unforgivable My death I could forgive My death I could live with What kind of madness of Momentary permanence I took the only action I could to assure I wouldn’t snap A snap would shatter Burst every molecule of who I am I did wh...
The Blue Crayon The blue crayon was worn down about half way. The paper jacket it wore was ripped down along the side but still held what remained. It was her favorite crayon. She couldn’t help herself. Even though she knew, if she didn’t stop using it, there wouldn’t be any of it left. But the sky is blue and my eyes are blue and the water is blue, so I need it. Well, you could put some clouds in the sky. You know white puffy ones and maybe some gray or black clouds. And you could put an island in the water with trees and some fish and turtles. Then you could use the other colors. But I like what I did. Yeah. I know and it is beautiful. And you really did a good job. I’m just saying there are other colors in the box. And maybe somebody else might use the blue crayon. I know but if they do, then I won’t have it. And it is my favorite color.
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